July 2011
69 posts
3 tags
June 2011
38 posts
vinewombat5097 asked: Do you ever wish you could fly?
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Marbles in my Mouth
The more I think about it, the more I believe this story supersedes my “head falling over” story, as the most embarrassing thing that has ever happened to me. It also marked the moment when I completely stopped giving any fucks about what my peers thought of me. In my senior year of high school, I was in an Honors English class, mostly because I was too lazy to take AP classes, but also because I...
2 tags
This weekend was interesting to say the least. I talked a kid that I hardly know out of suicide, went to my first MLS soccer game, almost died on I-95, woke up to my brother yelling to me that he was going to die/pass out as he stumbled to the bathroom, proceeded to get really scared when I heard him collapse into the bathtub and it dawned on me that my parents weren’t home and I was...
jigsawcupcakes asked: Shane, how old are you?
Am not sure if you already mentioned this on your blog but I just would like to know ~
Am not sure if you already mentioned this on your blog but I just would like to know ~
1 tag
This is why I am such good friends with my brother. This little conversation took place last night when he was putting my in my bed:
Me: Can you pull my socks off?
Him: No. You're just trying to get naked. This isn't Girls Gone Wild, Shane. It's time to go to sleep.
hahahaha
strokeofcreativity-deactivated2 asked: Hey! Your blog is amazing :D I have a question though.
How did you transition from middle school to high school? Like what helped you get over your insecurities and helped you be more open about who you are?
How did you transition from middle school to high school? Like what helped you get over your insecurities and helped you be more open about who you are?
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rumplecuntskin asked: Why are you cripple? In Russia we put you out of misery. You want me end your suffering?
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Never underestimate the daylight!
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Great Story
A few posts ago I mentioned I would tell you guys about the random trouble my brother and I get into to entertain ourselves. This is one of those stories and it took place probably 5 to 6 years ago, so I was about 13 and my brother was about 10. Enjoy.
It was a hot and humid summer day in Pennsylvania, and like most other kids our age, we were bored out of our minds. Back then we spent most of...
I only drink Sunny D on rainy days.
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UGH
I have never had a girlfriend. Not one. There was a brief period in 5th grade when I hung out with the same girl at recess for a few days in a row. She shared her lollipop with me once and I thought things were getting pretty serious; I woke up the next morning with strep throat and that was pretty much the end of that. Romantic, I know. For most of my life, not having a girlfriend was really no...
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protestification asked: Why do you do this?
pleasesweepmeaway-deactivated20 asked: Hey Shane! I was wondering what you studied at college? <3 your blog, your sarcasm and just general internet presence lights up my day. :)
laughingneverhurts asked: Hi so I read your entire blog and I was just wondering how you type on your computer?
9 tags
Awkward McAwkwardson
As you know, all of my muscles are extremely weak. I have been getting weaker since my muscles stopped developing around the age of three or four. My body lacks a protein that is vital to the creation and sustainment of muscles. Therefore, working out serves no purpose because I can’t build new muscle tissue, but at the same time, never using my muscles causes them to disintegrate faster. It is...
3 tags
Big News
Hey everyone! First, I want to thank all of you who have taken the time to read my posts over the past couple weeks. Second, I am really excited to tell you all that I have decided to write a book using the stories I have written here, as well as many more. I know writing a book takes time and there is a huge chance it will be a huge failure, but I think this will be my best chance to have a real...
emptyrefredgerator asked: Hi shane! I'm curious, how do you get weighed when you go to the doctor for physicals? Do they make you get out of your chair?
12 tags
Don't Stop Staring!
People stare at me… real hard. Whenever I am out in public it is pretty much a guarantee that at least a few people will make it completely obvious that they have never seen someone like me before. By “someone like me” I mean an alien-like pterodactyl creature with a human head that uses a wheelchair. Ok, that was a slight exaggeration, but I must look awfully messed up for some of the looks...
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A random old woman walking her dog stopped me as I was driving my chair to my cousin’s house. Before even saying hello, she creepily asked if I could give her dog a short ride on my wheelchair because “she would definitely sit on your lap and love a ride.”
I said no.
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Well, this was difficult!
Right now, it is 7:30 AM, and I am wide-awake. One of the shittier parts of being in a wheelchair is that I have to rely on someone else to help me dress myself and move me from my bed to my wheelchair. Initially, this fact might not seem like a very big deal, but you’ll have to trust me when I say that it is a highly annoying situation. I essentially have to live my life by the schedules of my...
I think the real reason I’m doing this is because the thought of having no real impact on the world absolutely terrifies me. Shit.
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Doors
My birthday was last weekend and my friend invited me to go to a non-professional, arena football game that he had free tickets for. Arena football is stupid to begin with, but when you add the fact that most of the players in this league were sub-par players from shitty community colleges, the final product is laughably terrible. The tickets that he had gotten for free usually sell for $21. I...
4 tags
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Handshakes
(I feel like I should probably tell you all that I am extremely sarcastic pretty much all of the time, so if you ever read something on my page and think “wow this kid is a bitter douchebag,” chances are I’m just being sarcastic, so please don’t hate me.)
Dear Everyone,
Please don’t ever, under any circumstances, attempt to shake my hand. I know it’s tempting, my severely atrophied...
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Listening to Circa Survive outside in the sun for the rest of the day. I’ll try to crank out another post tonight. Tell all your friends to follow me, or don’t, it’s really whatever.
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The Day I Broke My Femur
When I was in 11th grade, I was forced to take an adaptive physical education class, much to my dismay (I just wanted to be in a normal class with my friends). This class consisted of me and two mentally challenged students, not that there’s anything wrong with people who are mentally disabled, but honestly, these kids both smelled like there was always a giant pile of poop in their pants and all...
7 tags
This is Probably a Terrible Idea
I will most likely be dead before I turn 30. Even that estimate is a generous one. I have a disease called Spinal Muscular Atrophy (Type 2) that has been slowly destroying all the muscles in my body for the last 18 years, 11 months, and 354 days. Eventually I will catch a cold, it will turn into pneumonia, and my body won’t be able to fight it off, at least that’s what all my doctors...
